Low Sexual Desire

Therapy, Coaching, and Counselling

Low or absent sexual desire is far more common than most people realise, but it’s something that many struggle to talk about. You might notice your interest in sex has faded over time, or that it has never really been there in the first place. You may feel a mismatch with your partner’s level of desire, creating tension or distance. Or perhaps you feel at peace with your own low desire, but are under pressure from outside expectations.

Whatever your experience, it is valid.

At JKL Therapy Centre, we know that sexual desire is not a simple “on/off switch”, it changes with life’s seasons. Stress, emotional wellbeing, health conditions, medication, hormones, relationship dynamics, past experiences, cultural values, and even the pace of everyday life can all influence desire. None of these factors make you “broken” or “less than”.

We also understand that low desire can stir up a complex mix of feelings: shame, frustration, sadness, confusion, relief, or even guilt for not feeling how you think you “should”. These feelings can be heavy to carry alone. Therapy provides a safe, confidential space where you can speak openly, without fear of being judged, rushed, or pressured to change. Our role is to walk alongside you, whether you want to explore ways to rekindle desire, understand why it has shifted, adapt to it, or simply find peace with where you are now.

What issues can be addressed in therapy for low sexual desire?

  • Understanding the emotional, physical, and relational factors that affect libido

  • Navigating mismatched sexual desire in a relationship

  • Rebuilding intimacy after life changes such as childbirth, menopause, illness, or bereavement

  • Addressing shame, guilt, or fear about not wanting sex “enough”

  • Exploring the role of stress, anxiety, or depression in reducing desire

  • Unpicking the impact of past trauma, sexual pain, or negative sexual experiences

  • Managing the influence of medication or hormonal changes

  • Developing new ways to connect and be intimate that feel safe and fulfilling

  • Exploring whether low desire is a temporary phase, a long-term preference, or part of an asexual orientation

Different groups and subgroups we work with

  • People of all genders and sexual orientations

  • Individuals whose desire has reduced suddenly or gradually

  • Couples or partners experiencing tension due to different desire levels

  • People navigating cultural or religious beliefs around sexuality

  • Individuals questioning whether they may be asexual or on the asexual spectrum

  • People recovering from physical illness, surgery, or emotional trauma

  • Clients balancing desire changes with parenting, caregiving, or work stress

Who can benefit from therapy?

Individuals

You might be feeling relieved to finally talk about this or anxious that there’s something “wrong” with you. In therapy, you will not be told what you should want. Instead, we’ll explore your thoughts, feelings, and body at your own pace. For some, this means gently uncovering what might reignite desire. For others, it means embracing low desire as part of their authentic self. Both paths are equally valid.

Couples and different relationships

When one partner wants more sex than the other, it can lead to misunderstandings, resentment, or feelings of rejection. We work with couples (or multiple partners in non-monogamous relationships) to help them talk openly, move past blame, and explore new ways of being intimate, both sexual and non-sexual, so that everyone feels heard, respected, and cared for.

Cultural Sensitivity

Your beliefs about sex and desire may be shaped by your upbringing, community, or faith. These influences can create pressure, conflict, or feelings of shame when your lived experience doesn’t match expectations. We approach this work with deep respect for your values, helping you navigate your relationship with desire in a way that feels authentic while honouring your personal and cultural identity.

FAQs

  • Desire is influenced by many factors: emotional, relational, physical, and cultural. Stress, health, hormones, life changes, trauma, relationship patterns, and medication can all play a role.

  • No. Sexual desire is highly individual. It’s only an issue if you feel it’s impacting your wellbeing or relationships.

  • Therapy is not about “fixing” you, it’s about understanding what’s happening, exploring what you want for yourself, and supporting you towards that goal.

  • We can help you talk openly about needs and boundaries, explore different forms of intimacy, and find solutions that feel respectful and sustainable.

  • Possibly. Asexuality is a valid sexual orientation, and therapy can give you space to explore whether that resonates with you.

  • Everyone’s journey is different. Some people notice shifts in a few sessions; others benefit from longer-term support. We’ll move at a pace that feels right for you.

Get in touch.

Get in touch with a member of our professional team.
All enquiries are handled non-judgementally, confidentially and with the utmost sensitivity.

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